Help! I can't decide!

Conflict Coaching Can Help

A client recently described a troubling situation with her elderly mother. Mom is living alone with the help of an aide but is not doing well and the client needs to consider next steps. Although there are multiple adult siblings, only the client is actively engaged in taking care of mom and the other siblings seem to be quite content with that arrangement. The choices for Mom are to stay where she is or to relocate to a facility that could meet her needs as those needs evolve. The conflict for the client is an internal one: should Mom be moved to a facility that is a good match for Mom’s interests and cultural values or to a facility that is closer to the client and more convenient in terms of being able to visit regularly with Mom and support her evolving needs. Since the siblings are not at all interested in getting involved in this decision, and Mom is totally dependent and not capable of contributing meaningful input, I suggested that the client consider one-on-one coaching to help process all of the pros and cons that this decision involves in order to reach a decision that will take into consideration Mom’s values and needs as they are currently as well as possible unfolding scenarios.

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